Platypus

A horriffic showing on NFL games brought the record for the week down to 13-7. Overall, the record sits at 43-17. That's good enough to make playoffs in pretty much anything.

But I can do better.

Let's see how it goes this time around:

College Games

California over Oregon State
UCLA over Stanford
Washington over Arizona
Missouri over Colorado
Virginia Tech over Georgia Tech
San Diego State over San Jose State
Ohio State over Iowa
Fresno State over Colorado State
Rice over Army (Upset Special)
Navy over UConn

Pro Games

49ers over Chiefs
Browns over Raiders
Saints over Panthers
Vikings over Bills
Chargers over Ravens
Dolphins over Texans
Rams over Lions
Bengals over Patriots
Bears over Seahawks
Eagles over Packers

Posted by Robert at 09:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Combine this with the previous post on Borat and I'm on an international affairs kick. Kind of.

A song I recently found a weak spot for is "Canadian Idiot" by parody king Weird Al Yankovic. This song is a parody on "American Idiot" by Green Day.

Now, as a qualifier, my grandmother was born in Oyen, Alberta and, as a promise to my great-grandfather, never became an American citizen -- which was to her advantage when being bugged by ballot measure petition signature solicitors at Wal-Mart.

This was a little different than most Weird Al parodies. He actually gives Canada some credit for positives such as low crime rates. Yeah, I picked the easy one -- I'm not using this post to get in the middle of a debate on socialized medicine.

Don't wanna be a Canadian idiot
Don't wanna be some beer swillin' hockey nut
And do I look like some frostbitten hose-head?
I never learned my alphabet from A to Zed

They all live on donuts and moose meat
And they leave the house without packin' heat
Never even bring their guns to the mall
And you know what else is too funny?
Their stupid Monopoly money
Can't take 'em seriously at all

Well maple syrup and snow's what they export
They treat curling just like it's a real sport
They think their silly accent is so cute
Can't understand a thing they're talkin' aboot

Sure they got their national health care
Cheaper meds, low crime rates and clean air
Then again well they got Celine Dion
Eat their weight in Kraft macaroni
And dream of drivin' a Zamboni
All over Saskatchewan

Don't wanna be a Canadian idiot
Won't figure out their temperature in Celsius
See the map, they're hoverin' right over us
Tell you the truth, it makes me kinda nervous

Always hear the same kind of story
Break their nose and they'll just say "sorry"
Tell me what kind of freaks are that polite?
It's gotta mean they're all up to somethin'
So quick, before they see it comin'
Time for a pre-emptive strike!

Now, as a peace offering for anybody still peeved at me posting this, here's self-depricating humor: Another Weird Al song, "White and Nerdy."

Posted by Robert at 11:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

While not one to quickly criticize any President of the United States, I must state my current anger at the Bush administration for turning down a famous Kazakh journalist at the White House gates.

If you don't realize that's a joke, please read more carefully in the future.

"Borat: Cultural Learnings of America to Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazhakstan" opens in November.

Posted by Robert at 08:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

At a press conference today, Butte County District Attorney Mike Ramsey officially declared the deputies involved in the shooting death of Eric Smith clear of any wrongdoing.

Here is the official press release distributed to the media at the press conference. Some changes were made for AP Style, and the exact address is not being included:

Eric Ethen Smith, 40, Paradise, was shot by deputies of the Butte County Sheriff's Office during the early morning hours of Sept. 16, 2006 outside his girlfriend's residence in Magalia. Shortly after the shooting, the Butte County Officer Involved Shooting/Critical Incident Protocol Team was activated. The team, which is made up of senior investigators from all Butte County law enforcement agencies, commenced and completed their investigation, submitting their findings to District Attorney Mike Ramsey.

After careful review of the above cases, it is this office's determination no criminal liability of any sort attached to the actions of the involved deputies, Mark Muhlbaier, Sam Burnett, Silver Paley and Arnold Rey, in their Sept. 16, 2006 shooting of the above individual. An analysis of the facts show the above deputies' actions to be justified under both Penal Code Sections 196 and 197, as well as the general principals of the law of self-defense.

This office the above deputies were discharging their legal duty of protecting the public when they were called to [the 14800 block of] Crescent Drive in Magalia by Smith's girlfriend who expressed concern that Smith had taken her .380-caliber semiautomatic handgun out onto the back porch of their shared residence. She further reported when she confronted Smith about the gun he said "Tell my mom and dad that I love them," which caused her concern that Smith might be suicidal. While on the porch with sheriff's 911 dispatchers, the girlfriend heard Smith shoot the handgun, which was confirmed when neighbors began to independently call 911 dispatch to report gunshots.

Having assessed that he would be facing a despondent and therefore potentially dangerous gunman, BCSO Sgt. Jason Hail assumed tactical command of the above four deputies and cautiously approached the involved residence. Sgt. Hail sent the deputies Paley and Rey with their long guns ahead to cover the north driveway and attempt to see into the rear area of the residence while he and deputies Burnett and Muhlbaier covered the south driveway and front of the residence with their handguns.

As the deputies began to get into position, Smith "popped" up between two vehicles which were in the north driveway, shouting "Here I am, f—kers!" or a similar profane challenge. The deputies all trained their gun-mounted flashlights upon Smith. Deputy Paley saw a gun in Smith's hand and began to shout for him to "drop the gun!" several times. Instead Smith silently brought the weapon up and pointed it at Paley. Upon seeing this all the deputies made their own individual decisions to fire their weapons at Smith. Sgt. Hail did not shoot as he was not in a position to properly engage Smith.

Smith was hit and fell at the location between the vehicles. Deputy Burnett approached and kicked away the gun he saw lying next to Smith's hand and Deputy Rey handcuffed Smith for officer protection. Paramedics, who were staged nearby, responded almost immediately, but Smith was pronounced dead at the scene from multiple gunshots.

Subsequent investigation showed the gun which had been kicked away from Smith's hand was loaded with a round in the chamber, the hammer cocked back and the safety off. This piece of evidence, along with his ominous statement to his girlfriend, his shooting off the porch to attract law enforcement attention and his ambush of the officers, lead me to conclude that Smith was engaged in "suicide by cop" – a colloquial term used to describe a suicidal incident whereby the suicidal subject engages in consciously life-threatening behavior to the degree that it compels a peace officer to respond with deadly force.

The deputies here were in reasonable fear of imminent danger of great bodily injury or death from Smith's actions with his handgun and were justified in their actions that evening.

Posted by Robert at 09:19 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

One of my biggest gripes with Monopoly was the ways you went to jail.

The game provides three ways to go to jail. First, you could land on the "Go To Jail" spot on the board. Second, you could draw the "Go To Jail" card from Community Chest or Chance. Third, you go to jail for rolling doubles three times in a row.

Basically, by being in a certain place, drawing a card as the rules of the game command, or by taking a roll of the dice, you could wind up in jail.

Welcome to the world of San Francisco Chronicle reporters Mark Fainaru-Wada and Lance Williams. For being in a certain place, playing the rules of the game and taking a roll of the dice, they've been sentenced to jail for 18 months.

Media are cringing over this. If you're not, you should be.

Here's the deal: Fainaru-Wada and Williams basically proved beyond a reasonable doubt that steroids were a major part of professional baseball and, in particular, the San Francisco Giants' speedy leadoff-hitter-turned-lumbering-slugger Barry Bonds. Of course, part of that was because somebody (likely a Dodgers fan) leaked grand jury testimony to the reporters.

Since grand jury testimony is supposed to remain secret, it's no surprise the government isn't all that thrilled to see said testimony being published for the world to see. It's also a crime to divulge that testimony.

So, how do the reporters fit in? Well, the government wants to know who did the leaking. But the reporters gave the source a promise of confidentiality and are refusing to reveal the sources.

So, is the government acknowledging this long-standing tradition of journalists using confidentiality to obtain information important to the public that wouldn't be know otherwise.

Of course not. That makes too much sense The handcuffs are being slapped on the reporters' wrists.

What's the big deal, though? If the government wants to know who committed a crime and is jeopardizing the integrity of grand juries, why not turn it over?

The reason is that there would be another integrity compromised if the reporters turned over the information — the integrity of journalists' promise of confidentiality, which in my mind is just as crucial to democracy as grand jury secrecy.

I think that's what so many who are yelling to throw away the key are missing. That and they're blinded by a general dislike of media.

If Fainaru-Wada and Williams broke their promise of confidentiality to the source, they will have acted as an investigatory arm of the government. The American press, in principle, is to be a totally separate entity from the government—free to roam without official persecution from elected or appointed officials.

The idea of that is akin to the federal government's checks and balances system it has in place for itself. The media is to act as an independent checker of the government as a whole.

So turning into an investigatory arm of the government's not really the way to go.

In sentencing the two reporters, the judge told they "hold the keys to their jail cell." In other words, they themselves determine when they would be released from prison by choosing the reveal the source.

I want to correct the judge here (not something I do all that often). The person that holds the key to the jail cells isn't the reporters; it's the source. All the source has to do is agree to release the reporters from the promise of confidentiality (in other words, face the music themselves) and all is well.

It's that source the government really wants anyway, not the reporters.

But maybe there's a correction due there as well. The person that really held the keys was the judge himself.

But it was easier to jeopardize the First Amendment.

For more, I forfeit time to Chronicle columnist C.W. Nevius:

We will say this is when baseball and other sports finally acknowledged the unpleasant truth, that performance-enhancing drugs are a huge problem. We will say that this is when a shield law for journalists, allowing them to protect confidential sources, became a matter of public debate. (A bill for a national shield law was recently introduced by Republican Senator Arlen Spector.)

And it will be the moment, for good or ill, when the spotlight swung to Mark Fainaru-Wada and Lance Williams. It is entirely possible that they have reserved their place in school textbooks, just down the page from Woodward and Bernstein. For years to come they will be "those BALCO guys.''

One can only hope.

Posted by Robert at 10:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I've got to remember to do this sooner in the week.

75 percent success rate so far (30-10 on the season). Let's try to keep this going.

College Games

Cal over Arizona State
UCLA over Washington
Oregon State over Idaho
Washington State over Stanford
Ohio State over Penn State
UConn over Indiana
Notre Dame over Michigan State
Miami (OH) over Syracuse
Rutgers over Howard
Tulsa over Navy (Upset Special...kinda)

Pro Games

Eagles over 49ers (If the Niners wind up winning this one, I'm picking against the Niners every game for the rest of year, 'cause as a huge fan, I'll take that kind of jinx)
Steelers over Bengals
Seahawks over Giants
Patriots over Broncos
Packers over Lions
Redskins over Texans (this would have been the Upset Special, but Portis is back)
Titans over Dolphins (so this will be it instead)
Buccanners over Panthers
Bills over Jets
Falcons over Saints

Posted by Robert at 11:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Last night I covered the Constitution celebration event held at the Table Mountain Masonic Lodge in Paradise.

The keynote speaker was retired Rear Adm. James Miller, who discussed the United State Constitution and the USS Constitution, the ship best known as "Old Ironsides."

The following, which Miller said was a journal entry written by a former commander of the ship (albeit before the ship was known as Old Ironsides) got a laugh from those in attendance--many of whom were veterans.

"On July 27, 1798, the USS Constitution sailed from Boston with a full complement of 475 officers and men, 48,600 gallons of fresh water, 7,400 cannon shot, 11,600 pounds of black powder and 79,400 gallons of rum.

Her mission: "To destroy and harass English shipping."

Making Jamaica on 6 October, she took on 826 pounds of flour and 68,300 gallons of rum.

Then she headed for the Azores, arriving there 12 November. She provisioned with 550 pounds of beef and 64,300 gallons of Portuguese wine.

On 18 November, she set sail for England. In the ensuing days she defeated five British men-of-war and captured and scuttled 12 English merchantmen, salvaging only the rum aboard each.

By 26 January, her powder and shot were exhausted. Nevertheless, and though unarmed, she made a night raid up the Firth of Clyde in Scotland. Her landing party captured a whiskey distillery and transferred 40,000 gallons of single malt Scotch aboard by dawn. Then she headed home.

The USS Constitution arrived in Boston on 20 February 1799, with no cannon shot, no food, no powder, NO rum, NO wine, NO whiskey and 38,600 gallons of stagnant water."

So let's review: Over seven months, 475 men went through 10,000 gallons of water compared to 252,000 gallons of alcohol, not including the rum salvaged from the attacked merchant ships.

That's over 530 gallons of alcohol per man over 208 days. That's over two and a half gallons of booze per man per day.

And the insult was that you were what livered?

Posted by Robert at 02:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

An interesting social experiment by journalists and First Amendment organizations at Florida Atlantic University.

How would this play on the Ridge?

Posted by Robert at 12:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Most everybody reading has likely heard of a "gas war" where two close gas stations force each other's prices down trying to attract customers.

Well, this is taking the gas war to a whole new level.

Posted by Robert at 11:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I wrote two stories today concerning statement Paradise Unified School District Board of Trustees candidate Glenn Stankis made during Tuesday’s board meeting.

Because of that emphasis on Stankis’ comments in those stories, which were mostly paraphrased, I thought it would be right to show what exactly he said. So following are Stankis’ comments in their entirety, courtesy of a written copy Stankis provided me after the meeting.

TO: PUSD Trustees and Supt. (Steve) Jennings

FROM: Glenn Stankis, Concerned Citizen

RE: Insufficiency/Inadequacy of Instructional Materials for 6th & 7th Grade World History Studies.

Just 3 months ago, the Board approved the selection of 2 specific new World History textbooks for the 6th and 7th grades — the former for the study of how Judaism and Christianity developed, and the latter for the development of Islam. The several deficiencies of the final choice for the 6th grade studies were outlined by me just before the actual inappropriate Board vote. Due to their serious nature, several will be reiterated tonight, along with the deficiencies recently found in the choice for the 7th grade study of Mohammed & Islam.

Important exclusive content advantages of the 6th grade textbook not chosen include:

For Judaism:
1) Specified that the beliefs of the Hebrew people, and their traditions have been important in the development of religion, law and the moral and ethical traditions of Western civilization.
2) Quoted the 10 Commandments, rather than just stating they are part of Judaism.
3) Described the supernatural events (e.g. parting of the sea) relating to the Hebrews’ “Exouds” out of Egypt (i.e. Passover)

For Christianity:
1) Explained how the birth, death and resurrection of Jesus, the Christ, are celebrated in Western civilization as the holy days of Christmas, Good Friday and Easter Sunday.
2) Quoted both of Jesus’ most famous parables, “The Prodigal Son” and “The Good Samaritan”
3) That Jesus taught he was a manifestation of the monotheistic God, Yahweh.

Thus, PUDS 6th grade students will be receiving an inadequate understanding of the core aspects of the Judeo-Christian religions, as presented in Biblical scriptures.

The new 7th grade textbook attempts to describe the development of Islam and the life and character of its founded, Muhammed. Unfortunately this book makes several erroneous conclusions and serious omissions. One especially objectionable statement was made in the Comprehensive & Critical Thinking portion of the Teacher’s Guide, pg. 86. In answer to the question, “What relationship did Islam have to Christianity and Judaism” found in the student edition, the response shows was, “Muhammad’s Allah was the same God as worshiped in Judaism & Christianity.” The assertion is vehemently denied by present day orthodox Jewish, Christian and Muslim clerics, as well as most laity.

The textbook attempts to picture Islamic leaders as strong believers of tolerance, like that of the American civil rights leader, Martin Luther King. Examples of why this claim is unrealistic can be found today in most Muslim ruled countries. Examples include the following:
1) Morocco – Christian organizations are not permitted to have post office box addresses.
2) Indonesia – Since 1995, 900 Christian churches have been burned on destroyed. Land cannot be obtained for a church unless approved by 75% of neighboring Muslims.
3) Saudi Arabia – Bibles are considered illegal possessions.
4) Egypt – It is against the law to convert to Christianity and very difficult to attempt to change the religious tag on one’s identity card.

In the Islam scriptures (Koran), Muslims are instructed, (a) “Don’t make friends with Jews or Christians (Surah 5, vs. 51) and (b) “Fight against…those who acknowledge no t the religion of truth (i.e. Islam) among the people of the Scripture (Jews and Christians) until they pay the jizyah with willing submission, and feel themselves subdued” (Surah 9, vs. 29)

Last week Pope Benedict spoke out against Islam’s holy war stance and quoted the 14th century Christian emperor, Poleologas -- -“Show me just what Muhammad brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached.”

The 7th grade textbook also omits unfavorable aspects of Mohammad’s life, such as he had 12 wives/concubines and was an illiterate orphan.

Because it is unlikely that the 7th grade teachers have studied the Koran or detailed biographies of Muhammad, students will likely receive an unrealistic comparison between Islam and Christianity, and their founders. Thus this current instructional material must be considered insufficient and lacking in much value.

Posted by Robert at 11:17 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

So, my buddy doing the "master cleanse" threw in the towel after 49 hours with an In N Out Burger.

While this is roughly 191 hours shorter than he intended, it was still a valiant effort, and the two-day time period isn't actually all that bad for an occasional liquid fast, which isn't considered 100 percent bad the medical community. Still not all the great, but not totally bad.

I'm still sticking to my guns on the Scientology thing, though.

Posted by Robert at 11:53 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I'm on a streak of sorts and it's not necessarily a good one.

It seems as though as soon as I start covering a labor issue, it gets ugly. I mean, really ugly.

In a brief history:

*I started covering a labor dispute between the California State University and teacher's assistants right before the TA's were getting ready to strike.

*My first Butte County Board of Supervisors meeting started with a picket demonstration by member of Butte County Employees Association Local 1. Many angry comments during the supervisors' meeting followed.

*Then, there's the big one — the In-Home Supportive Services workers and the county. That one wound up resulting in this little wonder of legislation and an Assembly subcommittee hearing at Chico State.

So, that's my track record. Now I'm covering the Teachers Association of Paradise and the Paradise Unified School District.

Things started looking ugly at a couple of points tonight — teachers going over speaking limits, trustees losing cool, the whole yardage.

The first thing school board president Donna Nichols says to me after the meeting was "Robert, how bad was it?"

LATE ADD: Nichols was asking about her own personal blow-up during the meeting, not the meeting in general.

I told her I've seen worse at the Board of Supervisors. Of course, until an Assemblyman shows up a board meeting, the supervisors will be worse.

But here's a more specific answer to Nichols' question: In my past experiences with labor battles, some of the incidents at tonight's school board indicate the point of nastiness that eventually has this thing going one of two directions:

1) Both sides decided enough is enough and sit down to hash something out, or
2) It gets uglier. A lot uglier. Like ugly to the point that where the teachers and the district are at right now is Natalie Portman and where they'll wind up is somewhere around Dame Edna.

I guess you could call it a crossroads.

Mediation between the two sides starts next month.

P.S. Alternate titles to this post included:
Yo labor fight is so ugly, it didn't get a costume when it auditioned for Star Wars
Yo labor fight is so ugly, the NHL banned it for life! (unintended irony there)
Yo labor fight is so ugly, its momma said, "What a treasure!" and its daddy said, "Yeah, let's go bury it."

Posted by Robert at 11:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

People like to complain about how dumb Hollywood-types are. I never fully believed it.

I still don’t, but something recently happened that’s making that harder.

You see, there’s a couple of guys I know that are now making their living as background actors in television and film. They’re doing all right at it, too.

My one buddy is a graduate (he has a college degree, this will be important to remember later) from UC Santa Barbara and has done background work on such shows as “Numb3rs,” “CSI: Miami” and “How I Met Your Mother.” He’s also doing work on a couple of upcoming films such as “Blades of Glory” and “Ocean’s 13.”

But the other day, he started doing something so stupid, it could only be described as Hollywood. As Bill Engvall once (somewhat) said, it’s so stupid it bears repeating.

He’s currently on the second day of a seven-to-10-day kick of something he’s referring to as the “master cleanse.” The idea is that for the next 10 days, he will be on a liquid diet consisting of the following:

Morning: Quart of water mixed with two teaspoons of iodized salt.
Daytime: Several servings of a mixture of water, lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper.
Evening: Herbal laxative tea.

His source for this mother-of-all-fad-diets was someone he was working with on a set who read in a tabloid that Beyonce Knowles did it and lost 14 pounds in two weeks.

Seriously.

What necessitated Beyonce to have to lose 14 pounds in two weeks, beats me. And don’t even get me started on the factual relevance of tabloids — or, if you really want to get me mad, the abundance of tabloid payola.

Back to the issue at hand. He’s detailing, courtesy of his private blog, his experiences of the “master cleanse” and that we, his friends, will be his “support group as I try to get through this experience.”

At the moment, we're all either teasing him about what we're eating for dinner or asking for medical research to back it up. (which doesn't exist)

Hopefully, he’ll learn his lesson from this and in six months he won’t be telling me about his first audit and playing peekaboo with Suri Holmes-Cruise.

My cayenne, however, will continue to be used as God and Cajun chefs intended — with solid food.

Posted by Robert at 02:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Maybe I should homer vote a little more.

I went with one homer vote by picking Oregon to beat Oklahoma. And wouldn't you know it--I missed the final two minutes of the game where the Ducks came from behind to beat the Sooners.

However, I didn't homer-pick on pro level, saying my beloved 49ers would fall to the Rams' defense. But strong games from Alex Smith, Frank Gore and Walt Harris pulled it out. That's a loss I'll take.

Overall, I went 15-5 again, giving me a 30-10 record for the season.

But that still leaves 5 games for improvement.

Posted by Robert at 11:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Generally, I like to avoid national politics, because that's what every other blog we have seems to like to talk about.

But I'll go global...

Thanks to my buddy Shan for that little number.

Here's his post on the subject.

Posted by Robert at 10:58 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

When covering a meeting, public comment always creates the possibility for something to write about.

Public comment falls into one of four general categories: 1) riveting dialogue, 2) something that makes you go "gee, that's interesting." 3) long, boring and ultimatly pointless and 4) gag reel material.

Reporters are generally hoping for something that falls into the first two categories. Category 1 comments can be turned into a story immediately. Category 2 comments offer the potential to develop into a story.

Category 3 is just plain horrid. Some of the most impatient reporters around (*raising hand as gulity party*) can sometimes be tempted to commit journalistic seppuku with their notebooks if a lot of category 3 comments come along.

Then there's Category 4 comments--nothing that can be developed into a story, but still something that can be entertaining to watch.

Another interesting concept of public comment is when it is offered. The Paradise Recreation and Park District, for example, gets to public comment within five minutes of starting the meeting. Paradise Unified School District is usually pretty quick to get to public comment as well.

The Butte County Board of Supervisors waits until the end of its meeting, though. I've been at supervisor meetings where public comment didn't happen until 3 or 4 p.m.--when the meetings start at 9 a.m.

Maybe, in the future, when The Post gets technology to its reporters such as digital recorders and cameras, we can post that information to give people a better idea of what interaction with public officials is like here.

Until then, the best I can give you is this clip from one of my favorite films to act as an analogy. Whether the English and French are representing officials or the public is up to your own personal interpretations.

Posted by Robert at 12:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

So, I went 15-5 in the first week of the football contest.

Then I proceeded to forget the second week.

So, everybody's third week is my second week. Sorry about that. Plus, now that there are pro games on the schedule, predictions become that much tougher.

That being said, here we go:

College Games:

Navy over Stanford
Notre Dame over Michigan
Auburn over LSU
Louisville over Miami
Oregon over Oklahoma (homer decision)
Texas Tech over TCU
Arizona State over Colorado
USC over Nebraska
Florida over Tennessee (Apologies to Photo Editor and Vols fan Nick Baker)
Pitt over Michigan State

Pro Games:
Rams over 49ers (I'm crying as I type this, but the Rams defense is just too hot right now and won't be as fooled on the trick plays)
Ravens over Raiders
Bills over Dolphins
Bears over Lions
Saints over Packers
Cowboys over Redskins
Chiefs over Broncos (I'm grinning like the Cheshire Cat as I type this. Jake Plummer will look great in the uniform of anybody else next season)
Vikings over Panthers
Chargers over Titans
Jaguars over Steelers (Upset Special, aplogies to Nick again--he's a Steelers fan, too)

Posted by Robert at 11:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

API.

That acronym probably doesn't mean a whole lot of you--unless you have an interest in education, which is a significant portion of the Ridge population.

API stands for Academic Performance Index. It's a score given to schools that, in the eyes of the state, determine just how well children are learning. The API of a school is determined through the scores students receive on a number of standardized tests.

Right now, I'm working on a story talking about the API results of the Paradise Unified School Distirct, which is among the top five districts in Butte County.

The only thing I'm apprehensive about is how this story will be used in the future by people connected to schools in the future. To be more specific, in the debate that seems to exist over traditional and charter schools.

To be honest, that particular argument sort of blindsided me when I first came across it.

I mean, I can't even write a story about new computers at a charter without hearing an implication that the story makes people think computers aren't present in traditional schools.

I'm young enough to where computers were always present in classrooms -- I remember a brand new Apple IIGS being rolled into my kindergarten classroom in 1988 and I grew up in a place that makes Magalia look like Metropolis -- so the thought of that implication never crossed my mind.

Here are some thing people may say from this story I'm working on:

*On average, traditional schools scored higher than charters, so they are better.
*Charter schools have a higher median than traditional schools, so they are better.
*The two highest-scoring schools are charters, so kids have a chance to reach their full potential.
*The lowest-scoring school--even lower than continuation school--is a charter, so they are ineffective and a waste of taxpayer money.
*PUSD is among the top five districts in the county in API scores--give the teachers a raise.
*Paradise schools are getting their butts kicked by Durham and Chico schools--teachers don't deserve a raise.

Lies, damned lies and statistics indeed, Mr. Twain.

So, I cringe at the inevitable of people pulling whatever they prefer out of these API scores and using it to fit their agendas.

But I'm writing the story anyways. Why?

Because even though I know this is a story that will ultimatly be manipulated by those who desire so, there's also a segment of readership who will simply appreciate knowing the information and seeing how Paradise is doing against other areas of the county education-wise. Or it could be something for those who don't like the idea of standardized testing to gnaw on.

Call it taking the dark cloud for the silver lining.

Posted by Robert at 07:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

I mean, come on, dude. You're the punter.

(via Obscure Store)

Posted by Robert at 04:46 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Today’s little lecture will look at the many different types of phone tips reporters receive.

The focus of this will be on those in support of the position of the Teachers Association of Paradise and the salary increases sought from the Paradise Unified School District, the brunt of TAP's displeasure being focused on Superintendent Steve Jennings.

Before staff development workshops Friday, the teachers held a rally to encourage each other in the salary conflict. The teachers then marched silently to the Aquatic Park pond and formed a ring around the pond.

Now, I received two phone calls alerting me of this event. The first was the day before and was (somewhat) courteous, provided me with relevant information and said “thank you” at the end.

The second phone call, however, I found waiting on my voice mail after the event was over. Here it is, word-for-word:

Yeah, I was wondering if you guys have reporters over at the Paradise school district’s annual welcome-back breakfast at the duck pond park. The teachers are having a protest meeting there in the gym there right now. You guys ought to cover that; the staff wants wages, we want to know where our cost of living increase is and we’re not getting it. Steve Jennings is standing there with his thumb up his [censored] and maybe you guys want to take some pictures of him.

I’m going to admit I’m human — I have a preference on which type of message I would prefer to get my information from. I don’t have a stake in whether TAP gets raises or not, so what’s the point of trying to spin it to me in a voice mail?

So, which phone message would you prefer to listen to?

And, to be even more relevant, which phone communication would TAP President Stacie Martin likely prefer to have representing her organization?

On a side note, there is some visual disappointment here — Jennings, in fact, did not have his thumb inserted into anything, but was simply drinking a cup of coffee and eating some sort of pastry. I was getting ready to head to court, so I didn’t get a chance to tell just what kind of pastry he was eating or what he takes in his coffee.

Posted by Robert at 03:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I'm in one of those moments where I don't know if I should be angry or not.

There were some comments made by a speaker at the Paradise Town Council meeting tonight that--shall we say--rubbed me the wrong way.

Since I don't cover town government and the issue being discussed has no chance of making its way to county, I feel moderatly comfortable opining on it.

I'm not 100 percent confident these comment should have made me angry--more around 95 percent. Therefore, I'm going to discuss them just yet.

But needless to say, if my anger it's justified, just know I have very few buttons to push, so getting me angry is quite an accomplishment. The person who did could be proud, you might say.

Posted by Robert at 11:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

So, it's started--former Paradise Post reporters Jeremy Walsh and Valerie Lum have started their cross-country road-trip adventure that will eventually take them to the bright lights of New York City.

In a demonstration of the power of blogging, the tandem have launched a blog to document their exploits. Read all about it in Beaker Chronicles.

This passage indicates the promise of things to come:

We’re about to cross the road and climb a hill toward what our companions are calling an old abandoned slaughterhouse, but we’ve paused because the daughter of Rowdy Roddy Piper is getting second thoughts about leaving the relative safety of the ranch.

Posted by Robert at 11:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

As you can see from this video, the indoor/Arena variant of football has made its way to Germany.

But, the teams appear to be playing on a futsal field, which isn't 50 yards long by 85 feet wide, and doesn't appear to be the gentlest stuff to get tackled on.

To make it even more bizarre, one team is using the old single wing offense.

Posted by Robert at 11:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I'm one of the San Francisco 49er faithful.

Is the fact that I'm not terribly upset over the 49ers' seven-point loss to the Cardinals today a sign of lowered expectations or too much caffeine?

Maybe it's the third option — noting the new realities of the NFC West.

I don't think the loss was necessarily because the 49ers are bad. It's just because the Cardinals are that good.

Seriously, don't be surprised if the Cards wind up on the top half of the NFC West and in the playoffs this season. That one-two punch at wide receiver of Larry Fitzgerald and Anquan Bolden looks as though its going to click this season, Edgerrin James at running back is going to take pressure of the throwing game, Neil Rackers is one of the league's best kickers and they only have a two-time league MVP at quarterback with a Heisman Trophy winner as the backup.

Yeah, that's not loaded or anything.

So, for a Niners team loaded with a bunch of unprovens to go out, move the ball, pull off a few trick plays and have some solid special teams plays is a real statement. Here's some of the positives:

*Frank Gore averaged over 5 yards a carry, including breaking one for 32 yards, and had 170 all-purpose yards.

*Alex Smith has already double his career total of touchdown passes one game into the season.

*Top draft pick Vernon Davis' first career catch saw him break and couple tackles and go for his first career touchdown.

*The defense (and don't forget Julian Petersen isn't around anymore) holds Edge to under 3 yards per carry? Not bad.

*How about that monster punt return by Arnaz Battle?

Overall, I saw a lot of good stuff. If it weren't for the fact that the NFC West is so loaded this season (yes, even the despised Rams have good defense and appear to be on track to score more field goals than anybody) I would say the 49ers would be looking at a sparkling record.

But, the division is loaded, so that creates its own problems. And mistakes are still going to happen with the nucleus of the offense all being as young as Smith, Gore and Davis are. Plus, it was the Cardinals' defense they were playing against today--who knows how bad that is.

Posted by Robert at 10:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

A couple of weeks back, I wrote a piece on a MNG conference I attended in Vacaville that focused on the Web capabilities of newspapers.

One of the comments posted on ParadisePost.com from that story (one of ParadisePost.com's many new features, by the way--take advantage of it) came from Sherry Worthington:

To me this is sort of scary, even though I read this publication on line as I reside in Puryear Tn.
My son is a pressman, what will folks like him do if "print" goes away?
My Ex-Husband delivers the news papers, he to will be out of a job, and means of making a living.
Buy I do understand the appeal of the Web.

A few things to say about this, reflecting my beliefs on where newspapers are going in the next few decades: (although Dan Nguyen-Tan may use this to futher prove his theory that we newspaper reporters are subjective conspirators out to destory whatever we feel like destroying)

I guess, first off, the fact that this comment was made shows one significant advantage of the Web — it's 2270 miles and 33 hours driving from Paradise to Puryear, Tenn. The Web gives the opportunity for newspapers to access readers that would never have been seen before.

I will admit I never considered the impacts on the presses with the expansion of online. Editorial departments, in theory, should have a significant disconnect with other aspects of newspaper operation, so the thoughts of the pressroom's future never crossed my mind.

That being said, I wouldn't be too worried. Often, people think that if online expands, print is just going to disappear. That's not going to happen, because there's always going to be a need for print newspapers. There will always be some people who prefer it. Plus, most newspapers print more than just paper. Here in Paradise, for example, not only is The Post printed, but several other newspapers and magazines, business cards, phone book, etc. The first time I ever walked back there, it wasn't the Post being printed—it was the Berkeley phone book.

So, much like online journalism is an adjustment for reporters, there will be adjustments for pressman as well.

Same goes for delivering newspapers. Since print isn't totally going to go away, there will likely be fewer newspaper deliverers, but the profession won't totally go away.

On another level, new professions are created and old professions go away with changes in technology. I imagine there were more people that made their living as stagecoach builders before the automobile was invented. More people worked on building railroads before highways came into being.

Heck, I'm sure there are plenty of people who would dream of some sort of technology that would get rid of newspaper reporters. Especially young smart-alecky ones. J

I know it's not perfect. I grew up with that—my dad is employed in public works, but I'm sure he'd rather be doing his old job of being in charge of lumber inspection at a mill. But this a force beyond the control of newspapers—it's either adapt to the ways people are going to read and put money in the coffers or go out of business.

I'm guess what I'm trying to say is this: Online will expand, print won't totally go away, people's occupations will adjust and level out accordingly.

Hope that helps, in some roundabout way.

Posted by Robert at 10:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

You can go from covering a trial to a hamster race in less than 24 hours.

Posted by Robert at 10:04 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I'm sure Rick Silva and Carol Peterson will forgive me for linking to "the other paper" on this one.

In the brief period of time I've been on the court beat for The Post, one of my biggest helps down in Oroville has been Enterprise-Record court reporter Terry Vau Dell.

The courts can be confusing if you're not ready for them. When you first start, you feel like you're running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Or a lab mouse in a maze. Or the St. Louis Rams' defense any given Sunday. You get the picture.

Terry's been covering courts longer than I've been alive and doesn't mind passing on some advice to the young newbie reporters in line at the metal detector. In fact, as part of the pieces of advice I received on covering courts from my beat predecessor Valerie Lum, she told me "Terry is our friend/competitor. We LIKE Terry."

He can consider this post a thank you.

Anyhow, he has a story in today's edition of the other paper where he got sit in on the county's dependancy court--basically the court where people retain or lose parental rights to their children.

It's sure to be an eye-opener. Dependancy court is incredibly stringent on confidentiality rules; Terry told me it took several months for him to be able to gain admittance and even then he had to be intentionally obscure in describing what he saw.

Posted by Robert at 11:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

If you willing to work three years as a consultant on a new general plan for Butte County (looked at past failed attempts, the "easier said than done" argument has some merit) you could make just a shade under $1.6 million.

LATE ADD-ON: Here's all of the things the exact maximum contract value of $1,593,206 could buy:

*363 Fender® Merle Haggard Signature Telecaster Electric Guitars. Come on, folks, it's Merle. Although I might want to get it in a Buck Owens paint job instead…

*6,638 Elvis costumes. You know somebody is going to be "All Shook Up" over the amount of the contract. Or, as I'm discovering working in Paradise, upset that a consultant is being used, period.

*2,489 HP Pavilion Media Center a1530n Desktop PCs. To think Achieve Charter School Principal Casey Taylor is only shooting for two more in each ACS classroom. Ha!

*Somewhere between 13 and 22 2007 Porsche 911s. Zoom zoom this, kinda-scary kid from the Mazda commercials.

*1,609,298 rolls of Tums EX. Considering the history of trying to figure out land use issues in this county and a General Plan being all about land use, this particular expenditure by the consultant isn't too wild of a thought.

*And in a wise spending of the money, 32,283 one-year home-delivery subscriptions to the Paradise Post. I'd just hate to be in the circulation department if that address gets missed...

Posted by Robert at 10:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I found this story from the Carolinas on the media news Web site of Jim Romenesko.

Basically, the Ku Klux Klan of the Greensboro area have found an interesting method of distributing hate mail (pun intended) by taking copies of local newspapers such as The Rhinocerous Times, putting their flyers in them, and then self-distributing them in the paper.

Sadly, there might be a loophole, as explained by a leader of the group:

Robb defended the way his newsletters are distributed, saying that no newspaper has perpetual ownership of its product and that, over time, anyone with copies can do with them as they please.

For a newspaper reporter, that's kind of scary. Basically, somebody's piggybacking on your work. If it's a racist group, that makes it just that much worse.

What makes it even more difficult is there's always a segment of readership that cannot make the connect that just because an advertisement appears in a newspaper doesn't mean that the newspaper agrees with it. It just means somebody was willing to pay the newspaper to have the advertisement placed and the newspaper decided it wouldn't be unethical to take the money.

It doesn't even stop at advertising -- Post reporter Chelsey Shoop had to field an angry, ranting phone call from a reader because of the African hunting article written by Jim Ledgerwood that she had absolutely nothing to do with. I don't know if she had even read it at that point. Talk about brutal.

Anyways, back on subject.

It's scary to me that it might actually wind up being legal that someone can take my work and use it as a Trojan Horse for whatever nefarious acts and thoughts they might endorse. I mean, for me, it's hard enough having to wade through what's told to me by politicians, lawyers, unions, organization leaders and the general public and trying to find what the actual truth is without possibly getting end-arounded on a technicality like this.

It's scary, really.

Posted by Robert at 11:03 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

While over at Achieve Charter School today, I received word that folks involved with the school are generally throwing support behind Tim Titus for Paradise Unified School District board.

Not really a surprise -- Titus has a charter school background in addition to a previous term on the PUSD board, helping to found Paradise Charter Middle School. And Achieve's status as an independent charter school can cause friction with PUSD over lost attendance money.

Since word is also that the Achieve folks generally aren't in the camp of Glenn Stankis, that leaves the question of who the Achieve community would prefer off and on the board between incumbents Marilyn Connor and Mike Greer.

Thoughts?

Posted by Robert at 04:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

This is the 100th post on Platypus!

Allow this kid--one of the few I've seen that could beat fellow Post reporters in a dance-off--to demonstrate how to celebrate this monumental event.

Posted by Robert at 09:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

It was certainly interesting going up to Pulga today and seeing upwards of a thousand people crowded onto a small beach across from a Caltrans yard to celebrate Labor Day in a particular idiom the local colleges have earned a stereotypical reputation for. (See a Post photo gallery from Pulga by clicking here)

I just wish I could say I was surprised.

The concept of new Labor Day hangouts popping up in the wake of the Sac River crackdown was talked about in the offices of The Orion in the past couple of years when word got out that a crackdown was on the way.The general consensus was that law enforcement and elected officials were facing a question of when the new rendezvous would pop up, not if.

There's a reason that the football term "end-around" is used in situations such as this. On an end-around, the offense makes the defense think the ball is being run in one direction so they focus on one side of the field, only to have the quarterback hand off to a receiver running to the opposite side. By the time the defense changes direction, the receiver is in a position to gain yardage.

Basically, the police defense focused their attack on the Sacramento River, only to see people desiring to celebrate their Labor Day with copious amounts of booze and bikinis end-arounding to Pulga.

I just graduated from Chico State in December, so I'm very familiar with the emotions and debates of the crackdown on the Sacramento River. With every crackdown, there's an acknowledgement that there were problems that needed to be corrected, but also an underscore of "we'll find a way get around it" throughout campus and in student neighborhoods.

Crackdown on the river? Everybody meet in Pulga. Crackdown on St. Patrick's Day? Trade the green clothing for some sombreros and party it up on Cesar Chavez Day.

Heck, it was even that way when I was at College of the Siskiyous, which has half the full-time students of Paradise High School. If the cops busted a party in the middle of the forest, everybody just found a new spot even deeper in the woods the next week.

To be fair, the Pulga crowd wasn't particularly rowdy while I was there. You got the general noise and chaos that comes with a crowd of that size drinking.

"Woo, newspaper's here!" was the general reaction from partiers to seeing me roaming around the beach fully clothed and holding a notebook. Inebriated people tend to be more enthusiastic about answering interview questions, even if some of the words coming out aren't printable. It also helps when you're similar in age to most of the partygoers.

At the very least, several people learned that yes, there is a newspaper in Paradise. Don't know the odds they'll remember it in the morning, though.

I witnessed one injury while there. When using a rope swing, there's a two-step of process of 1) hold on the rope until momentum until carried out over deep water then 2) let go. A young woman forgot Step 2 and wound up hockey-checking herself into a rock bank.

She was placed on a rubber raft and floated across to where Butte County Sheriff's Office deputies and CDF medics treated her. She didn't appear to be particularly injured.

Basically everybody I talked to described themselves as "local" and hailing from places such as Chico and Oroville, lending credibility to the argument that it's "out-of-towners" causing all the problem at events such as Labor Day on the Sac or Halloween in downtown Chico.

But it's hard to keep events like this calm. It's natural that when people have fun, they want to try to share it with their friends. As a result, crowds grow. Bad seeds eventually find their way in and that leads to a crackdown. Locals will find somewhere else (I'll bet it's either somewhere Upper Ridge or along the Sac in Tehama County next) and the vicious cycle starts all over again. What starts as a bunch of Chicoans, Paradisians and Orovillians getting together for a few cold ones on a day off winds up with Orion reporters interviewing people from Australia.

I can't imagine that Supervisor Bill Connelly will be too thrilled that a potential new Sacramento River is occurring in his district. Considering Connelly already has Lake Oroville issues to deal with, I can imagine last thing he wants is to have the additional floating problems in the districts of Jane Dolan on the Sac River and Kim Yamaguchi on Butte Creek dumped in his lap.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out over the next few years.

Posted by Robert at 11:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I went 15-5 during Week 1 of the Football Contest, bombing on such decisions as Cal, Virginia, BYU and missing on the Western Michigan Upset Special.

Sure, 15-5 sounds good, but this is Tune-Up Week. This was a bunch of games with Div. 1-AA teams. 15-5 isn't all the great.

Hopefully, things will go better next week.

Posted by Robert at 01:46 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Wildfires are another one of those little reminders God likes to use to explain to the human race that no matter what kind of destructive technology we design, he's got us beat any day of the week with one hand tied behind his back.

The Scottwood Fire on Friday was another reminder of that for me.

As the calls for the fire came over the office scanner, I grabbed the office point-and-shoot digital camera, found my destination on the office map of Paradise and Magalia and bounded into my car.

Honestly, I didn't think the fire was going to be that big, until I rounded the last corner to it on a long driveway off Scottwood Road and saw a wall of flame crowning over trees, shooting a column of dense black smoke into the sky.

Needless to say, the words I non-audibly mouthed at that sight are not suitable for publication here.

As I covered the fire from the Scottwood Road side (fellow Post reporter Kelly Reed and photographer Brett Holman were on the Old Clark Road side) jotting down notes and shooting pictures of tankers dropping streams of fire retardant and Paradise Fire Deparment personnel hand-carting hose across a bridge to save several homes, I received several reminders of the power of fire and its impact on places such as the Ridge.

Reporters are allowed a level of access to fires the general public doesn't get. Even without wearing Nomex, which fire departments prefer reporters have on when that close, I was close enough to feel the heat of flames, have ash and embers fall on me like snow (it shouldn't be snowing in September), hear the deafening snaps of a low-hovering helicopter directly overhead, and feel the mist coming from the water in helicopter buckets.

I also spent the rest of the day, thanks the combination of smoke from the fire and sweat from the 90-plus degree weather, smelling like a combination of a smokehouse and my high school locker room after football practice.

That isn't to say I'm not well aware of fire's impact. I grew up in northwestern Siskiyou County, a place where the thick vegetation, steep elevation and general abundance of summertime lightning make the Ridge seem fireproof.

Among the memories I have are watching flames shooting up utility poles blowing up transformers, seeing blackened, charred leaves land just a few feet from where I was standing, hearing helicopters fly over my house to the town airport in the early hours of the morning and red-colored night skies that weren't much different in color than sunsets

And that's just what I remember — my mind has totally blacked out evacuating from fires in 1987 when I was 4 years old that eventually burned a quarter of a million acres and came within a tenth of a heartbeat of torching my entire town.

Even with that, every fire the comes through is another reminder of just how powerful the forces of nature are and that even with all the preparation in the world, it can still burn you.

Literally.

Posted by Robert at 01:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

This is just a quick blog apologizing for -- well, the lack of blogging.

Combine numerous court cases with trying to get ahead of the curve to spend as little of Labor Day as possible working and the penchant for busy times in the office to have a fire(s) added on equals little leftover time to blog.

I'm in the office this weekend and Labor Day, so hopefully something substantial will come out of that.

Posted by Robert at 12:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)